Seriously. I found this while digging around. It's an idea for some mod.
lol wrote:
FoTCDDaAoAtEtUaE:tBfK
Cue the Babylon 5 music, buy some baby cats, and make an appointment with your eye doctor, because it's time for... (Drumroll, please)
FLEETS OF TERROR, CARNAGE, DEATH, DESTRUCTION, AND ANNIHILATION OF ALL THAT EXISTS, THE UNIVERSE, AND EVERYTHING: THE BATTLE FOR KITTENS
(End drumroll.)
You might be asking yourself, "What the fuck is this?" Well, I will tell you exactly what the fuck this is! It's a fleet mod I made out of boredom, inspired by ITAS and Etu Nimtsal.
First, a bit of backstory about the mod:
*ahem*
In the year 2337, Dr. Gae Fag discovered that kittens are natural entropy enhancers. In layman's terms, this means that kitten + Brownian motion (eg. a cup of coffee) = energy. This lead to a novel form of space craft propulsion, the fagdrive (which is little more than a bunch of kittens in a vat of very strong coffee connected to an engine). Ships equipped with fagdrives can travel much faster than conventional ships, reaching so-called "Ludicrous Speed" in a retardedly short amount of time. However, the true power of the fagdrive was not discovered until the year 2377, when a fagdrive-powered ship, the USMFSSB (Unites States Mother Fucking Space Ship, Bitch) Assfucker suffered an engine breakdown and exploded. The power of the explosion was enough to rip a hole in the space-time continu-whatever-the-hell-it's-called and create a wormhole (or asshole, as they have been known ever since). Scientists soon found how to create localized wormholes by using smaller fagdrive-based explosions, and how to control them. This enabled space ships to teleport around the universe. Everything seemed to be going fine until the explorer ship USMFSSB Dick Suck warped to the Penis Cluster and was attacked by aliens native to that region of space. The Dick Suck attempted to warp back to Sol, but the aliens were able to track it and invade Earth. Since dubbed the Generic Otherworldy Invaders with Insanely Advanced Technology (GOIwIAT), they have taken over the Moon and all of our orbiting space platforms and have began invading Earth proper.
Three months after the disastrous First Contact with the GOIwIAT, the United Nations realized that we were not going to win the war against the GOIwIAT with conventional tactics. So, they hired a man, known only as Miskatu Esk, to reorganize their army into something that could defeat the GOIwIAT. Esk quickly thought of a plan. He put together the Desperate Alliance of Humanity for the Defense of Earth (DAoHftDoE) and used his large loli collection to entice vast numbers of pedophiles to join his cause. After establishing automated loli factories across Earth, Esk had the resources to keep recruiting pedophiles in huge numbers.
Anyway. That's that.